Well hi! I guess its been a while since I've updated this here piece of Internet! I've been a little busy :) We finally got our little bean sprout out of my tummy and into the world...though it took a lonnnnnng time! I'll write out the story another day, but the important thing is she is here and healthy and almost 3 months old now! WOW time is flying. Here are the quick details (in case you wanted to know?)...She was born June 2nd at 8:51 in the evening, weighed 7 lbs 4 oz, was 21 inches long, and is the sweetest thing ever.
Fresh baby girl!
I cannot even tell you how much this little peanut has changed our lives for the good. Nobody tells you all the hard stuff about giving birth and bringing a new baby home for the first time. It is the most challenging, stretching, gut wrenching thing you will ever do. BUT its also the most amazing, incredible, indescribable thing you will ever do. I never know there could be room in my heart to love someone so much! I thought I was pretty much an expert in being in love since I met Ben, but I basically had no idea. :-) I will never be able to logically doubt God's love for me again. The transition from wife to wife and mother is the fastest one you can make. Becoming a wife is a pretty graceful transition. Think about it...
you get to spend the whole day looking more beautiful than anyone else, with all your friends and family there, you get a diamond ring, and then you get to go to a hotel and...well you know. THEN you go on vacation for a week and practice some more...then you come home to tons of presents! What could be better than that?
Here's about how the transition to becoming a mother takes place...you spend hours (in my case days) in a kind of pain you didnt know existed, with people you dont know looking at your girly parts (not that you really care in that moment), then you go to a room where a stranger teaches you how to feed a human out of your own body parts, then you come home and nobody tells you what to do, you wake up every hour and take a concoction of pain meds, forget to eat for 8 hours, forget to go to the bathroom for a few days, keep a running chart of poops and pees and change a bagillion diapers, look up online with your husband what baby poop is supposed to look like, examine the poop, then worry a little bit, then laugh hysterically, then cry for no reason, then get scared, then realize again that nobody is going to tell you how what to do, then realize that youre a mom and you cant put them back, then get mad at yourself for even thinking that thought. Then you look at your husband and remember that he's your husband and not your roomie. Then you feel so much love your heart feels like its going to explode and you cry because you cant stand the thought of your tiny little baby ever doing anything except lay curled up in a ball on your chest with milk on her cheeks. :-)
Then one day you wake up and realize that this is who you are. You are a mom. Its not like being a mom is something you do, as if you need to have some time to "just be yourself", you are a mom. Its the best feeling in the whole world.
It really is amazing. I am so blessed.